To my knowledge the exact definition of a dream is a, ‘fantasy, idea, aspiration, beautiful or ideal person or thing’. However, I believe that a dream is not just an everyday term that we use to pursue a goal or fantasy, it changes people’s lives and I believe that without serious dreams there would be no meaning to life. However dreams and memories can destroy a man if they are not altered or manipulated.
I awoke to the eerie sounds of the night, except that the sounds of Donanbrook were that of complete silence none of any creature. I seemed to miss that of the squealing pigs of home. I thought about what was to come and how my life would proceed considering what had happened. Would it change a great deal or would it return to normal once the procedures to repair the damage were complete? No such brutality could be justified even for a greater cause. The only thing that saved me from the dreaded insomnia, which I suffered was the border line belief I could seek redemption for my sins in death.
I moved down the hole in which was quickly becoming my residence only semi-aware of events around me. I stumbled over some person almost totally oblivious to the wounds which he had, I had no where to go yet I had no time for him and slid on past. My thought was far off in the distance muted by my innermost feelings of hate and anguish. I was vaguely aware of the fact I was now in the wide open, a deathly wind almost swept me off my feet. A faint relief came over me as I awoke from my conscious dreams only momentarily before slipping back into the zombie-like state of mind that harbored my conscious fantasies.
As I gazed across the muddy landscape I could see puddles of stagnant water as far as my eyes could see in the dark. There was a vile rotting smell, which seemed to rebuke everything it coated. I turned my back on the horrible sight, which beheld in front of me in ruin, my once safe haven throughout the past few years now torn and trampled. No more, No stop, I turned away as tears swell up in my eyes, I hadn’t cried since I was 5 but the sheer feeling of helplessness was overcoming. I put my stained brown jacket back on and button it, I fixed my hair and dusted down my clothes as I stepped back inside the trench. I enjoyed to look neat it gave me a great sense of well being.
I am stunned as a rattle explodes at far too close a distance; I sprint down the trench and grab one of the short arm riffles. Lock and load as the siren goes off. I step back out into the stagnant air and take position. My thoughts go blank as any troubles can cause a distraction. It did not look good though they have wearing down our defenses for weeks, many of my friends have been slaughtered. I take aim and reduce men to their knees as I rattle my rifle across the land (Mindless slaughter for what and at what price?)
My conscious mind is slowly loosing; the dreams that have haunted me may finally be silenced. My sins have been redeemed I have been paid back that which I have dealt out to thousands of soldiers. My dreams of soldiers easing into an “honorable” death have faded, and possibly now I may dream for all time in which my friends and family are save from the terrors of the world. I will meet everyone I have lost and see what bright future is held for my family. I watch as bullets stream across my head and the world destroys itself. With a final breath I hope my soul will be carried to the next stage of my… journey. I wish for great memories to be held of me and of how I lived instead of how I died. As I remembered this my spirit rose dramatically and I drifted off into reasonably untroubled sleep.